Hopefully everyone had a great Christmas, ours was nice and quiet, and we have had so much fun having a little time off with each other. So This morning I Got a Late Christmas Present, I went to get an MRI scan on my back. Don't get me wrong I absolutely hate being in that tight little tunnel all Calostrophobic, with just a few inches from my nose to the ceiling... And if I wasn't nervous enough about that they pulled me out after 30 minutes, told me not to move a muscle because doing so would have messed up the imaging, and stuck me with an IV to pump me full of dye, so they could get better imaging of the built up scar tissue and damage from my last surgery... I was not too happy about that.(not a needle fan) but there is something I Love about all of this... Answers..Well I'm hopeful for answers I should say. I have been on a waiting list since the beginning of August to see this back surgeon specialist, and the day is finally approaching! January fifth to be exact. It is kind of eery though, When I called all the way back in August I asked for the first available date, and it was on the fifth, The exact day of my back surgery last year. I am both creeped out and intrigued by this. Lets just hope its not a repeat of this last one. I'm hoping for a good out come this time. I'm not even so much hoping for this surgeon to say, yep, I can fix you! Lets get you into surgery, I'm just hoping for more answers... I just want anwers to some basic questions, When can I have a baby? How could I possibly manage nine months of pain without harming a fetus, Am I going to be in pain like this forever? If so, if its not fixable, how can I manage the pain better, and if it is fixable what kind of chances do I have of functioning normally again(with out pain killers) and what are the chances of being worse off than I am now. I don't think I was Naive  last time, but I went into the last surgery so hopeful of being me again, and when that did not happen I lost some faith, and I really can't get my hopes up again. The let down is just almost unbearable. So all I can hope for this time around is answers, So I can make informed decisions and move on with my life! Wish me luck!